Strong start, but it’s all downhill from there

I started my week off on a high note. Two paintings on Sunday, a pretty decent Monday. But today? Oh today. I guess the hormones or whatever have kicked it into high gear. Whatever you want to call it, it’s no fun on my end. I guess the overcast, rainy skies aren’t helping much. :: shrug :: Who knows.

Did my budget. Oh yeah, after paying my current bills, I’ll have $300 left over. By left over I mean that’s it folks. No more money coming in except for what The Man brings in, which sadly (due to insurance and shit) is not enough. That gets me one more month of rent, water, gas, phones (which my parents take turns paying right now because it includes their phones and tablets too). I didn’t even include electricity in that short term budget. Who needs electricity if you have nowhere to live? Right?

I applied to the company I’ve been wanting to work for yet again. I’ve lost count of how many times I’ve applied for this job. I have everything they need for this work-from-home position…EVERYTHING IN SPADES. I’ve even been a customer of theirs in the past. A loving, loyal customer. But I never hear back from them. If I find out Assholes, Inc. are at fault for this, I will have some heads for dinner when I run out of cheap sandwiches and low-grade pasta to sustain myself. Anyone have a recipe for asshead soup?

I feel like a total waste of space. A complete failure at life. Nothing I do seems to work. If I could afford to get drunk, trust me, I would.

I have my volunteer job at Steam. I love that. But it’s going to have to start paying soon or I’ll be forced to give that up because I won’t be able to pay for internet anymore. Shit, I will have to give up this too. No phone, no internet, no electricity. Might as well go live in a tent and read secondhand books while eating grass and trash can leftovers. Couldn’t hurt I suppose.

As you can see, today is a bad day. At least I had two pretty decent days. I am truly thankful for that. You have no idea how thankful I am for those days in between the madness. I hate the not knowing, the up-in-the-air shit. Makes everything so dark and dreary. Wish I could go visit my veggies right now. To rainy though. Oh well. Perhaps I’ll go scrub something. Or bust out the Pine-Sol.


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